The Counterfeit Hobo

Posted: October 25, 2009 by Brian in comedy, Homeless

Today, I was driving on the freeway getting ready to exit. At the bottom of the ramp, I wasn’t surprised to see a lady holding a sign that read: “Hungry, Homeless, God Bless”, in what seems to be the trendy kindergarten writing as if she couldn’t write. I mean, if you’re gonna do something so shameful, like ask strangers for money, don’t you think you should be a little more creative with your sign. Maybe bust out the Bedazzler or some glitter. Try to give me some back story as to why your stupid-ass is “Homeless, Hungry”. I know, it may seem harsh, but just wait–there’s more.

As usual, I try to give people in this state something. Anything I can find, whether it be some rogue pennies, food, a water bottle. Then I noticed something funny. She looked like she was in pretty good condition for a HoBo. She had some nice jeans on, pretty jacket. Then, the lady stood up, packed her sign, picked up her purse–YES, HER PURSE–, a couple of water bottles. I mean if this lady wasn’t a fake HoBo, she was one of the most prepared and proactive HoBo’s I’ve ever seen. Here’s the kicker. I started driving off, and both Meg and I could not believe what we saw next. The CoBo(Counterfeit Hobo), took a cell phone out of her purse and was now making a phone call.

I’m so glad I wasn’t able to find a penny to give this woman. Un-be-lievable…


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